Go Away, Santa, I’m Not Ready.

Thanksgiving isn’t even here yet, never mind that everywhere was pushing my Halloween stuff out of the way before it was even here. Noooo, never mind any of that. But, can we just talk about this for a second? I love Christmas, I do. I’m that day after Thanksgiving girl that immediately begins decorating the next morning. I enjoy getting my loppers out and tromping out to the cedar trees (no pine around here) and cutting lots and lots of fresh boughs. The tree goes out, my nutcracker (look, do not *touch*, it’s a serious offense in my house) collection, among other things go out. I like the vintage style, I spend at least three full days doing everything and I don’t mind taking it down. I decorate for every holiday but none so much as Halloween, Christmas and Easter, in that order. I have more decorations than your average old lady. But there is a time and a place for it.

As I’m ranting about this the other day it occurs to me…Christmas is coming. It’s not that far off. My heart begins to pound, I pale, my eyes go wide and the panic begins. I have little to no money this year. I can get the kids enough, I always do. I am not worried about them, they always have enough. So, it begins. I have Miabear, Kitty, and Flutterby to worry about. What about my real family? What about my two brothers? What about Kitty and Flutterby’s four children?! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?!

Last year, I made Kitty a stuffed Oblina doll, from Ahhhh! Real Monsters. It was much loved, and is still haunting a hanging light in her living room, staring at people. I feel bad for people who don’t know who Oblina is. That’s a sad fact in itself really but having her watching you wrapped around a chain? I can only imagine.

So, I’ve got needles, thread, glitter, glue, other various craft supplies and one hell of an imagination. I have been crafting to a ridiculous level. It makes it so much worse when I’m making people things. Some strange part of me gifts pretty heavily to those I really care about. I have no idea why I do it but I do, I always have. So far, Miabear is getting a book safe. Let me just say that is not as easy as it looks, people. I even went so far as to have the page number start on a special number. Yeah, I’m that attentive to detail. She is also getting a handmade journal. I was going to hand make the paper, but that didn’t work so I used copy paper. On this, use a thimble, you’re gonna need it. I glued nick knacks all over the cover as well. She is also one of those people that gets oddly cold all of the time so hand warmers are happening. She is terribly close to her niece and nephew so I’ve been gathering pictures of them to use as well. Because I’m a cool girlfriend, that’s why. I’m awesome and I know it.

Kitty is getting an Ickus to go with her Oblina. I have the fabric for that, haven’t done it yet either. I have, however, made her purse. It’s denim, with four pockets besides the huge one and has mushrooms on it. I used exaggerated stitches and spent at least an hour trying to turn the strap inside out. Kitty will also get a mushroom pillow. I bet you can’t figure out what Kitty collects? Yeah, she’s a hippie. A hillbilly hippie. Just…let that sink in.

As far as Flutterby…I’m at a loss. I was going to do butterflies or pigs but I don’t know. I have no idea what to do for her this year. Of course, I’ll make her a peanut butter pie, it’s a tradition. I’m also going to write down my recipes for her and organize them in some cool way but unsure on that. Other than that? I’m clueless.

Someone else is getting a glass bong. Yeah, I *made* it. From scratch. Well, I mean, I had a bottle but whatever. It’s for tobacco, of course. Hmmm….

I will post pics later of these things and the COMPLETELY KICK ASS PURSE I MADE FOR ME, later. I’m also making myself a really cute apron and one for all three of my kids.

Is anyone else going the handmade route for their Christmas? What are you making? Is anyone freaking out about gifts like I am? I need help. Maybe a therapist.